


Alteration Finds (The Never Shaken Remix)

by Nary



Category: Jeeves & Wooster
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Caretaking, M/M, Mpreg, Remix, Service
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-07
Updated: 2014-05-07
Packaged: 2018-01-23 21:05:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1579532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nary/pseuds/Nary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jeeves has his ways of making sure everything goes smoothly - including Bertie's pregnancy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alteration Finds (The Never Shaken Remix)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [zulu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zulu/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Alteration Finds](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1170) by [zulu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zulu/pseuds/zulu). 
  * In response to a prompt by [zulu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zulu/pseuds/zulu) in the [remixmadness2014](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/remixmadness2014) collection. 



_**Jeeves' Restorative Tonic for Gentlemen in a Delicate Condition**_  
_1 raw egg_  
_a generous splash of Worcestershire sauce_  
_Juice of 1/2 lemon (reserve a curl of zest for garnish)_  
_2/3 cup soda water_  
_~~2~~ ~~3~~ ~~6~~ olives to taste_  


* * *

"I say, Jeeves, this is quite the thing. It does do wonders to perk up the spirits." I reclined in the bath with my glass of restorative tonic in hand. The warm water was also of no small assistance in improving the mood of the scion - and soon-to-be progenitor - of the Wooster clan.

"I am most gratified to hear it, sir." Jeeves swanned about the room as he normally did, hanging a robe on the hook for afterwards, laying out the towels, and ensuring that one's soap and flannel were ideally positioned for ready access and whatnot. "Perhaps after you conclude your bath, you might lie down for a short, recuperative nap."

"Jeeves, I'm not an invalid," I said with a sniff. "If I'm to be... in the family way, then I shan't let it get in the way of my usual pastimes."

"Indeed, sir. However, if I may suggest, being temporarily indisposed would provide a convenient excuse to forego Lord and Lady Worplesdon's dinner invitation this evening."

"You make a valid point, Jeeves. There's no need for Aunt Agatha to know about all of this. 'Family way' doesn't extent to aunts."

He inclined his head as if to say he knew perfectly well that he had made a valid point, as always. "Yes, sir. As to the matter of your wardrobe..."

I waved a hand damply in his direction. "I leave that in your capable hands, Jeeves."

"Very good, sir." 

* * *

_"Yes, a private fitting will be required, Mr. Hilditch. In fact, if you were able to come to the gentleman's abode and conduct your business here, I feel certain that you would be most gratified. An order of, oh, at a minimum, a dozen shirts and half a dozen pairs of trousers, and a number of suitable jackets and waistcoats will also be required... Thank you, sir. Tomorrow at eleven will do nicely. Oh, and if you could also bring three pairs of braces in black, dove grey, and taupe, it would be much appreciated."_

* * *

When I emerged from the steam-filled chamber, wrapped snugly in my now-voluminous robe, Jeeves was occupied with hastily sewing sundry supplementary buttons onto my trousers. "What's all this?" I asked, lowering myself with what I fancied was grace and dignity to the Chesterfield. 

"To permit the use of braces, sir. In the intervening period prior to your new wardrobe's arrival, they should ensure a more comfortable fit. I have also taken the liberty of laying out the trousers you prefer to wear to Christmas dinner, sir, the more... ample ones." He bit the thread off between his teeth with a snap.

"Well, I don't know that I'd call myself 'ample,' Jeeves," I said, a bit miffed. "More Rousseauesque, perhaps."

Jeeve shot me the arched brow. "I fancy, sir, you mean 'Reubenesque.' Although Jean-Jacques Rousseau did have many notable theories about child-rearing..." He paused, then stood abruptly because he must have noticed me coming over all worryingly pale and wan. "Sir? Are you well?"

The truth is, the idea of child-rearing - which is to say, the idea that there would actually be a child, and that I would be expected to rear it - hadn't dawned on me until that moment. "Jeeves," I managed to choke out as he reached my now-convex side, "what the devil am I going to do?"

He permitted me to lean manfully upon his bosom and shed a few discreet tears. "It will be all right," he murmured, dispensing with a fraction of his customary formality as he patted me on the back. "We shall find our way through this predicament together, as always."

"Yes. Yes, you're right. I know you wouldn't leave me up the duff without a paddle."

"Never, sir."

"And I suppose you must know something or other about the care and feeding of infants, surely? You know something or other about everything else under the sun."

"A smattering, sir. It has not heretofore been my primary area of expertise. But anything I do not know currently, I shall endeavour to learn. There have been numerous expert works published on the subject. And in the meanwhile, sir, we shall continue as usual, as best as we can."

Knowing that Jeeves was, in his usual comforting way, taking everything in hand, it felt as if a great weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Not my abdomen, though - that felt just as ponderous as ever. "I don't know how I can ever thank you, Jeeves."

He gave the very slightest smile. "If the youngster is of the male sort, sir, the name 'Reginald' might serve nicely."

* * *

_"I regret to say that Mr. Wooster is presently indisposed, Mrs. Travers. I should of course be happy to take down any message you might care to leave for him... Yes, I understand the urgency, Mrs. Travers. A seventeenth-century silver baby rattle, for sale at Belmont's? Very good, madam, we shall secure it at once."_  


**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on Tumblr at [naryrising](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/naryrising) if you want to ask questions, make requests, or chat!


End file.
